The Painted Veil (2006)

There was a lot of love in the time of cholera and we’re not even talking about the film Love in the Time of Cholera (2007). In the PG-13 pic The Painted Veil (2006), British bacteriologist Walter Fane (Edward Norton) fights a cholera outbreak in a small, isolated village in China. As he battles to save residents from the deadly disease, the good doctor is also struggling with his unfaithful wife Kitty Garstin Fane (Naomi Watts). Apparently, when it rains it pours! Based on Somerset Maugham’s 1925 novel of the same name, the unromantic epic follows Kitty as she breaks hearts and busts balls. English vice consul Charles Townsend (Liev Schreiber) falls for her despite having a wife (Juliet Howland). But that doesn’t stop the dude from doffing his duds to bed sex kitten Kitty. Just 19 minutes into the movie, Liev leaves his clothes behind to bare his behind and hairy chest! Of course, Kitty will eventually dump her side hump even though he secretly sires her son. Before then, she encounters Colonel Yu (Anthony Wong), a Mother Superior (Diana Rigg), Waddington (Toby Jones), Wu Lien (Xia Yu), and the skin on Mr. Norton! The Fight Club (1999) star looks so good, you may beat off. The first rule of The Painted Veil is not to talk about how arousing the shot of Ed’s pecs are. If that’s not hot enough, the tall glass of water may make a splash in your pants when he flashes his ass. What a knockout!