Tour De Pharmacy (2017)

Tour De Pharmacy (2017) is dope — literally! Under the direction of Jake Szymanski, this HBO comedy paints the cycling world as a place where drug use is as ubiquitous as sexy guys in tight spandex. Not much of a stretch if you ask us. Like the sports satire 7 Days in Hell (2015), this romp uses a mockumentary format narrated by Jon Hamm. This time, an amphetamine scandal disqualifies all Tour de France competitors, except for five. They are African-American cyclist Slim Robinson (Daveed Diggs/Danny Glover), American-born Nigerian cyclist Marty Hass (Andy Samberg/Jeff Goldblum), Austrian cyclist Gustav Ditters (John Cena/Dolph Lundgren), French cyclist Adrian Baton (Freddie Highmore/Julia Ormond ), and Italian cyclist JuJu Peppi (Orlando Bloom). Needless to say, the remaining racers hatch various schemes to come out victorious. Along the way, we encounter UCI president Ditmer Klerken (Kevin Bacon), BBC reporter Rex Honeycut (James Marsden), a French Police Officer (Will Forte) investigating a drug-laced water bottle, and the skin on Jabin Dolchey (Chris Romano). While Mr. Bloom, Mr. Cena, Mr. Diggs and Mr. Samberg all appear topless, Mr. Romano does them one better by exposing his entire body on camera! During an outdoor wrestling scene, the skintastic actor shows off his hairy chest, man-bush, swinging balls, and flaccid peen. If that’s not arousing enough, the nude dude also flashes his naked ass! Here at Mr. Man our drug of choice is dudity, and thankfully this pic provides a lethal amount of it. What can we say? We’re addicted to skin!