Lone Star State stud John Allen Nelson was quick to give validation to the phrase “Everything is bigger in Texas” when he went for a penis-teasing, butt-baring skinny dip as the character Connor Ashcroft in the erotic mystery movie Criminal Passion (1994). The shot of his schlong is a bit obscured, but it’s there in all its glory. John’s so sexy that it would be criminal (see what Mr. Man did there? Played off that Criminal title? Kudos for cleverness, right?) for him to keep his clothes on, a fact that he more than likely embraced when he showed plenty of skin as Martin Roberts in the flick Shelter (1997). The actor actually started out on daytime television, playing Jack Boyd in the soap opera The Edge of Night in 1984, then Warren Lockridge in Santa Barbara from 1984-1986. His first big-screen appearance was playing, appropriately enough, Hunk Golden in the movie Hunk (1987). If you’re a fan of kult klassics, you may recall him as Dave Hansen in Killer Klowns from Outer Space (1988). He’s guest-starred on just about every TV show that hit primetime from 1987-1989, and a few afterward, like Friends in 1994. He had regular roles as John D. Cort on Baywatch from 1990-1995, Matt Cutter on Sheena from 2000-2002, Walt Cummings on 24 from 2005-2006, and Senator Jeffrey Collins on Vanished in 2006. He continued his faux political career as President Devore in Crisis in 2014, and he can be found playing Jon Chota in Red Band Society from 2014-2015 and Silas Bunch in Crazy Ex-Girlfriend from 2016-2017. Mr. Man was going to pull a pun with Lone Star, but he’s just going to say that he appreciates John Allen Nelson a whole lot.
