40 Days and 40 Nights (2002)

Jesus famously fasted from food for forty days, but what's hunger compared to horniness? In 40 Days and 40 Nights (2002), our protagonist puts himself on a forty-day dry spell to try and deal with a nasty breakup. Josh Hartnett stars as Matt, a young man fixated so much on the fact that his ex (Vinessa Shaw) is getting married that he's experiencing some “sexual problems”. Trying to find a solution to those problems leads him to undertake one of the most absurd vows in skinstory: he's going to give up all sex for the duration of Lent. Perish the thought! Embrace the thots! After consulting his Catholic priest brother (Adam Trese), Matt declares that he won’t get busy with anyone including himself for 40 days. The horror! He makes the mistake of letting his roommate in on his plans and things get crazy from there. Wagering ensues, a website is created, and wouldn’t you know it, Matt meets the girl of his dreams, Erica (Shannyn Sossamon), but won’t get busy until the clock strikes midnight, ending his Lenten sacrifice. Can he make it to day forty? Mr. Man couldn't make it to the forty-minute mark after seeing how sexy Josh looked in this one. Josh Hartnett gives us a quick tease of side butt while jumping up from the floor after a quick one-timer, but his sheet covers up anything worth seeing. Instead, we get wild scenes like one where he wakes up with a massive erection that refuses to go away, one where he makes a woman orgasm by blowing on her lady bits, and a bunch where he walks around shirtless. Forty days is nuts. We nut seven days a week thinking about 40 Days and 40 Nights!