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He Loves Me

He Loves Me (2018)

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Review

We've all been there, right?  He Loves Me, He Loves Me Not? You're in a long-term relationship that is falling apart a little with all the things left unsaid, so what do you do???  You plan some alone time with a vacation to a beautiful location that NO ONE could possibly be unhappy in, that'll save your relationship, right?  Well this movie takes that narrative and makes all the "things left unsaid" and makes it quite literal.  The only dialog in this shorter format feature film is a voiceover from a narrator that tells the unflinching story of a relationship in its twilight and two impossibly gorgeous guys who are trying to make it work against all odds.  Neither of the main characters (played by Hermes Pittakos and Sanuye Shoteka) speak a lick of dialog to each other, nor do we learn their names, where they are from, or anything outside the driving voice from the heavens that narrates the beginning, middle, and possible end of a relationship in jeopardy.  Just two hunks in paradise, fully celebrating each other and their bodies without a break in action.  When we say, NO BREAK IN ACTION, we mean it...  This movie comes in at 74 minutes on the runtime and roughly 72 minutes of this one are Hermes Pittakos and Sanuye Shoteka going full frontal, wrestling naked on the beach, blowing each other underwater, screwing while on a hike, or laying out with a period jerking off session peppered into their vacation.  It marks Nude-Comer jobs for both the leads and also marks 9 (YES 9!) nude scenes minimum, where you get to see pretty much every inch of these sunbathing smoke shows from tops to tails.  FYI, you might need to watch this movie in "incognito mode" because this is about as close to porn as it comes, boys!