Closer (2004)

Relationships, as any therapist will tell you at a cost of $135 an hour, are hard. A couple, to stay together, must construct and adhere to a complex structure of honesty, half-truths, and outright delusions. The two intersecting couples of Closer (2004) manage to pin themselves into emotional corners they're unable to escape. First up are Dan (Jude Law) and Alice (Natalie Portman). She's a mysterious American tourist and former stripper who gets hit by a car, and he's her lovestruck London newspaperman rescuer who ends up writing a book all about their relationship. He's madly in love with her, but also cheats every chance he gets, including trying to hook up with his publisher's go-to photographer Anna (Julia Roberts). When that doesn't work, Dan tries to do some Catfishing as Anna, only for one of his victims, Larry (Clive Owen), to actually bump into the real Anna and start a relationship with her. Eventually our couples start sex-swapping, which leads to all sorts of lies, schemes, and secrets being revealed. Directed by Hollywood legend Mike Nichols, this one got all sorts of good reviews. But when you cast all these A-listers in an erotic drama, you run the risk of these bigshots not being willing to take it all off on camera. Unfortunately, that seems to be the case here, or at least close to it. While Natalie Portman plays a stripper, the only man willing to strip down was Jude Law, who shows off his pube mane down low, but it’s just a tease. Come on Jude, break the law a little and show us that meat-sword! We need those undies to be a little bit Closer to the ground, next time!