Napoleon (2023)

For years, Stanley Kubrick tried and failed to bring the life of Napoleon Bonaparte to the screen, and nearly a quarter century after Kubrick's death, Ridley Scott finally succeeded in doing so with Napoleon (2023)! Joaquin Phoenix stars as the titular ruler of France in the early years of the 19th century and follows him through his (ultimately unsuccessful) campaign to conquer all of Europe. The film also goes in-depth on Napoleon's relationship with Josephine (Vanessa Kirby) and how the two grew together, then apart (or Bonaparte, if you will) over the years. As a matter of fact, the film's only male nudity comes when Josephine is being unfaithful to Napoleon, sleeping with Jannis Niewöhner's Hippolyte Charles, who bares his ass briefly while getting ready to have Vanessa Kirby ride him on a bed! Throw in a sexy shirtless scene from Mark Bonnar and you'll be stroking your NaPOLEon!