#10: Emil von Schönfels in Grand Jeté

The tenth most watched scene of 2022 goes to Emil von Schönfels in the controversial German movie Grand Jeté. His teen character’s complex relationship with his mom snowballs into a sexual affair that includes this unsimulated handjob. Wow mom. It’s not the jerk off scene we were expecting in 2022, but it’s the jerk off scene we deserve.

#9: Valentin Braun, Anteo Chara, Enki Babylon, Markus Reid in Under the Rain

The enduring popularity of erotica filmmaker Noel Alejandro’s Under the Rain made it the only top ten most watched scene of 2022 from a title not released in 2022. How ‘bout them assholes. An artfully depicted gay foursome - complete with real anal sex - culminates in Valentin Braun’s breathtaking, hung-cocked cum shot! No wonder you guys are into this one.

#8: Elias Kacavas, Henry Eikenberry in Euphoria

One of the best nude scenes of 2022 can be found in this Euphoria flashback. As young Cal (present day Cal is played by Eric Dane), Elias Kacavas brings the divisive character’s teen years to life. In this scene the closeted Cal comes face to face with his best friend-turned gay lover’s (nudecomer Henry Eikenberry) hairy teenage cock and balls in the boys’ locker room! Henry + Elias 4 Ever.

#7: Theo James in The Time Traveler's Wife

Fans disappointed by Theo James’ prosthetic penis in The White Lotus need look no further than this series for the real deal. After teasing us with only backal for five episodes as a time traveling Chicago librarian who can only time travel in the buff, Theo James surprisingly went frontal in episode six! Turns out Theo’s got the meaty, daddy package we were all willing him to have.

#6: John Strong in Pleasure

If you can separate the subject matter of this under the radar indie (a wannabe Hollywood starlet trades in her big screen dreams for the seedy world of adult entertainment) from the nudity, you can appreciate real life porn actor John Strong’s world-class cock! We see it during this intense straight POV porn shoot. The year’s best erection is hard to beat… and easy to beat off to.

#5: Ansel Wolf Pierce in Euphoria

How does Euphoria top the 21 high school locker room penises in season one? By having blonde model Ansel Wolf Pierce plop down on the toilet bottomless in front of series star Sydney Sweeney in the season two premiere. The scene went viral, with many women divulging on Twitter that they’ve never seen a man sit on a toilet before.

#4: Theo James in The Time Traveler's Wife

Who could possibly be satisfied with just one Theo James penis scene? In the same episode that Theo showed his package while tumbling down a staircase, he gave us this incredible, closer look at his floppy time traveling goodness. Let’s make it three frontal scenes next year Theo!

#3: Brett Geddes, Jarrett Siddall in The Boys

The superhero satire The Boys delivered the year’s strangest nude scene, and that’s saying something (looking at you, Grand Jeté). ‘Termite’ Brett Geddes has the ability to shrink and grow in size. After wowing a crowd with his super cock, he shrinks down to crawl inside his gay lover’s (Jarrett Siddall) urethra for some ultra-kinky foreplay. Just brace yourself for the scene’s explosive finale.

#2: Nathan Bronson, Bill Bailey in Pleasure

As with most scenes in Pleasure, you’d do best to separate out the movie magic to enjoy the nude dudes here. Context (aforementioned would-be ingenue falls deeper down the porn rabbit hole) aside, lookalike jocks Nathan Bronson and Bill Bailey baring their matching erect cocks in an unsimulated mutual jerk off scene? How could you not watch.

#1: Bradley Cooper in Nightmare Alley

Was there any doubt that the most watched scene of 2022 would go to Bradley Cooper in Nightmare Alley? The media was abuzz with news of this A-lister’s cock reveal leading up to the movie’s premiere. In the end Cooper didn’t disappoint - giving us a damn good look at his penis during an erotic bath with Toni Collette. You guys have dickserning taste!