Tales from the Crypt (1989-1994)

Hello kiddies! Any 90's kid lucky enough to have had parents willing to pay for an HBO subscription knows the cheesy, pun induced terror The Crypt Keeper was bringing every week on Tales From The Crypt. Airing 93 episodes from 1989 to 1996, this horror anthology was based on the DC comic from the 1950's, with every episode presented by the wisecracking Crypt Keeper himself (John Kassir). Renowned for its use of practical effects, dark humor, and often karmic twist endings, tons of A-listers were on the show including Arnold Schwarzenegger, Brad Pitt, Ewan McGregor, Joe Pesci, and even Tom Hanks. Still held in high regards by horror connoisseurs, highlights of the show included "Split Personality" where Joe Pesci is a sleazeball who marries two identical twins by pretending to be two separate people who are also identical twins, "What's Cookin'?" where Christopher Reeve plays a chef who starts serving flesh including (no pun intended) that of his jerk landlord Meatloaf, and "Television Terror," in which the show predates The Blair Witch Project (1999) and the found footage revolution in horror by having Morton Downey Jr. play a tabloid TV journalist airing live from a supposedly haunted house. But if you ask Mr. Man which episode is his favorite, that'd have to be either "The Switch" where William Hickey tries to get into the pants of Kelly Preston by switching bodies with Rick Rossovich, or "Only Skin Deep" where Peter Onorati falls for a hottie in a mask (Sherrie Rose) at a Halloween party only for her to end up cutting his face off to make another mask. Why are those ones his favorites? They're the tales where we see some tight tails! At one point during "The Switch," Rick Rossovich is flexing in front of a mirror with all of his insane muscles absolutely popping off. Rick is absolutely shredded, so of course an old geezer wants to try out his bod! He's only wearing underwear because he's a man who knows how to drive us wild, but there is also a shot of his ah-mazing ass later that's so hot we want to give him a spanking! After seeing those buns, we'd happily slide into Slider's DM's! As for the hottie Peter Onorati, we see his ass thrusting while he's between the legs of the blonde babe wearing the creepy mask. Sure, the mask is weird but she looks like a keeper! Pushing all sorts of boundaries, even for HBO, those dudes were ripped on Tales from the Crypt!